Monthly Archives: June 2011
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Today my grandmother passed away. I got the call on my way out of work. I have not had such trouble maintaining my composure since 9/11. It has been a while since a tear cascaded down my cheek. I almost forgot that they taste salty.
My grandmother helped sculpt the man that stares back at me when I shave. If my grandfather is to thank for teaching me that I was blessed with all the necessities to attain greatness, my grandmother is to thank for teaching me how to see underneath the patina of life.
She did not have an easy life. Her hands were worn. The only nail polish those fingers knew was blood from being rubbed raw. Her eyes were dark like the Baltic and saw evil and suffering that I hope no decent person has to experience.
Her biography made me a cynical optimist.
She is the strongest woman I most likely will ever know.
She used to clean trains. One day a train collided with the one she was cleaning. She came home and acted as if nothing happened. It was a serious collision. She did not tell anyone because she did not want to worry her family. My dad and the rest learned from a third party. Grandma Byc.
My grandmother despised idiots and those with rose tinted shades. She taught me that they took life for granted and would never understand the true worth of a beautiful day or happy moment. Only by recognizing and living through suffering can colors ever be more vibrant.
My grandmother taught me that nothing is ever given to you. My grandmother taught me that life is a nothing more than a disgruntled wild stallion. A stallion that needed to be tamed by your own hand.
She showed me what it looks when a woman truly loves her man. When my grandfather passed away his grave remained the most pristine. She would bike almost every day to clean it. She would talk to him. She gave me something to hope for. Perhapse. I doubt I’ll ever be gifted such a wife.
My grandmother taught me never to waste a smile. I remember the moments of mirth that would encompass her face. Her face would blossom and her laugh would fill the room. They were far in between, but that is why they were so potent.
When I was younger my grandmother would remind me how weak I was. How lazy I was and how I have not earned or fought for anything. She knew that she needed to teach me the truth of the world so that my spirit would not falter when life began her inevitable abuses.
My grandmother loved me and was thankful that my father was able to shelter me from the harsh realities of the human condition. However she also knew the importance of sharing her tales and reminding me what a punk I actually was.
She taught me what reality truly was. She taught me how to not be disappointed by the inconsequential trivialities of a modern Western life.
She potty trained me. She watched me swipe the hat off a police officer while in my baby carriage. She watched me experience rage, euphoria, and slumber.
She warned me against girls manipulating me and having me get them pregnant just so they could get a green card and live on my dime. She taught me how to pray. She taught me about Ukraine and our family’s heritage.
Every meal she made had potatoes. When she was a little girl the Russian kicked them off their lands. She and her siblings had to starve because the last potatoes were needed to be planted in the Spring. She never wanted us to be hungry.
My grandmother expects a lot from me and my brother.
But she’ll be satisfied if we just end up happy with full stomachs.
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pUM7Ja4ux6I]
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How to Ignore Beauty.
Many guys have asked me how to deal with “hot girls.” They claim it is difficult to hold their composure in the presence of God’s greatest gift: youthful attractive feminine allure.
Occcam’s Razor: Ignore the beauty.
However these same poor souls face another dilema. They do not understand what this looks like. They may either ignore a girl too harshly or the concept of ignoring beauty is just to foreign to them.
They never had men teach them how to tie themselves to a mast in order to conquer the siren’s wail.
Behold. A case study of how different men handle beauty.
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=etf2kmQZP_k]
Jimmy Carr is the one to watch. His handling of the situation textbook. His aura enticing. His voice unwaivering. His stance dominating. His eye playful. His motive to bed these birds.
He first acknowledges their attractive qualities and then continues on with his life. Lesson one.
He places his back to them, their beauty to him is common place. After engaging the crowd and establishing the spotlight on him he turns back to the girls and playfully banters with them. For those who have found the Mystery Method; this is what a neg looks like.
He continues on engaging with the crowd and periodically responds back to the girls. He is unafraid of their perceptions of him. He keeps them off balance. They aren’t sure how to handle him.
He says things that others would shy away from in polite society. The whole conversation is dominating by his views. No others matter. His spotlight. Your indignation and contrary opinions are inconsequential. Alpha mentality. He doesn’t care what you, I, and especially the bombshells behind him are thinking.
His world. You’re a guest.
Rufus is the nice-guy walking up to a hot girl approach to talking to hot girls. He is awkward around them. He is saying pleasant things. He isn’t challenging them. His hands are in his pocket. Defensive. Uncomfortable. I find him reprehensible.
At the end he attempts to take control of his environment by getting the girls on his arms and walking around as if he has won. Nay. He has lost. You can see it in the awkwardness of him asking the girls to join him, the walk, and the subsequent seperation.
Carr didn’t need to touch the girls to feel special. Rufus did.
Nice Guy Shtick Method: hugging girls to feel like a “playa” and hope that your ability to hug tons of girls in public will make other guys jealous of you’re “skillz.”
The third guy is a bumbling fool who has already killed any hope of a threesome with these girls. In his mind it is impossible. He is everything you should not be.
Your hands give life to imagination. The world is molded by your hands. Act accordingly.
Study Carr’s interaction towards the end extensively.
He isn’t afraid to let the girls know that he is a sexual being and that he is unabashed. The attraction grows in their eyes. Notice how he is sitting in his chair in comparison to the other participants.
When I say ignore beauty I mean do what Carr has done in this clip. Do not let it tie your tongue or glaze your gaze. Acknowledge that it is there and that it does not hold you ensnared in its tentacles.
Be bold. Do not hide under a false glossy veneer. A female is intuitive and she knows when you are being shifty. A female is also intriqued by the man who does not fear retribution for the words he shares. Fearlessness.
More importantly the hottest girls in the place are the ones that get the least number of guys approaching them. 95% of guys believe that they will get rejected by an bombshell. This means that 95% of guys are not talking to them. This means that 95% of guys are talking to average or below average looking females.
This means that you have a better shot talking to a hot girl than an average looking girl.
Your eyes are finally begin to widen in understanding.
Guest Post: Crazy Girls: A Case Study
Written by: The Wiseman
First off, let me say it is a true privilege and honor to be writing for the LIFESTYLE. I’m a big fan of Mr. Byc’s work. What he preaches is the truth. However, I feel that his brash New York attitude needs a little refreshment from the West Coast. Here it goes, I hope this case study can forever contribute to the constant, dynamic evolution that is alphadom.
Let’s set the scene. You find yourself at a party. Good time out, you and your buddies are drinking and watching the floor for any potential talent. The night goes on and you meet a girl. You talk, she might be a little annoying, but you brush it off because she’s cuter than most girls. At this point, if you’re an alpha male, you know how this situation is going to turn out. You decide to flirt a little bit, but your eyes are on the ultimate prize.
It is here where I would like to offer some wise words of caution: tread softly, you are in the presence of a crazy bitch.
Now, at this point, you are probably asking yourself, “Is the chick I’m seeing crazy?” Let me make this real easy for you—yes. ALL GIRLS ARE CRAZY. Some just manage to show it less than others. But the majority lose their cool at the first sign of alphadom. Why are crazy girls bad you ask? Because they represent everything an alpha male is not. They want to tie you down. They want relationships. They want a nice guy who, frankly, is pussified.
Here’s a quick guide to crazy girls. Once you (correctly) assume that all girls are crazy, then you can start to manipulate the crazy meter of every girl you meet in order to see how much you can get away with until that bomb blows up in your face.
Step one: Gauge how slutty the girl is acting. Regardless of alcohol consumption, there are always certain stages of sluttiness that girls demonstrate. Don’t get me wrong, I am a big fan of the sexually liberated women who knows exactly what’s going down when she heads home with you for the night. However, I am not a fan of the slut who basically begs for a different guy to tear that ass up every night. With crazy girls, the main thing you need to watch for is that they try to use sex to lure you into a relationship. When you first meet them, they might seem down to hook up and progress as things get a little heated. But, once the fun is about to start, they say something like “We need to hang out more before we do that” or “I only do that for my boyfriend”. If at any point you suspect a girl is using her vagina to lure you into a long relationship, run. But, because this is your first crazy, you’ll probably make the mistake and continue seeing this girl. Or maybe the girl you meet is DTF and you decide to unleash some of that pent-up gonadal fury for the next couple weeks…Just wait, the crazy is coming. Be ready.
Step two: Listen to what they say. One thing about crazy girls is…well, they’re fucking crazy. They don’t make any sense because their brains aren’t wired to make logical thought processes. What I have picked up from crazy girls is that if they repeat something over and over, take the opposite to be true. For example, after I called a girl out and told her that she obsessed about me more than I ever thought about her, all I heard for the next week was, “I don’t like you!” five times a day. If that were true, then why is she repeatedly saying it out loud to me? It’s because she’s trying to verbalize her own insecurities and convince herself that she has an upper hand over an alpha male. These attempts, as we all should know, are futile. No one controls us.
[Sidebar: The last crazy I dealt with, by the time I was finished with her, kept telling me “I know you think I’m crazy BUT you’re the crazy one” ….right, you are proving my point more and more every time you say it.]
Step three: Remember bitches ain’t shit. When you finally decide that you are done with a crazy girl, be done. End it. Finito. Crazy bitches will pull out all the stops to make you feel like a piece of shit for ending all contact. They will cry, yell, get angry, act depressed, gain weight, lose weight, etcetera. Basically, at this point, the crazy has shown its true colors and it’s not going away. Do not feel any regret when you execute the final maneuver in the crazy girl process and SEPARATE COMPLETELY.
Crazies love to keep a shred of hope alive by asking, “We can still be friends right?” Don’t fall for it. Get the fuck out. Dip mode engage. However you want to say it—stop all contact. Be honest, alpha males don’t have friends that are girls. There are girls to fuck and girls not to fuck. Tell her that she has just fallen into the latter category.
This may seem harsh, but think about it. Most girls you meet you eventually stop talking to in a couple weeks. So why should you drag out the end of hanging-and-banging this broad by slowly weaning her off talking to you. Do yourself a favor and end it right away to save yourself the sanity.
Now that you have these three indicators, you can feel free to mess around with a girl to see how far you can get before the crazy comes out of the box. But be careful, once the crazy comes out, it does not go back in.
I am in no way advocating a complete boycott of crazy girls. In fact I am arguing the opposite. If you dare, go after the crazy girls to see how much of an alpha you really are. The good alpha gets in, gets out, and moves on so some other guy can experience the craziness. Plus, they might actually be pretty good in bed. But that only goes so far with crazies.
The trick is to always know how crazy your girl is acting. If their crazy levels are low to moderate, then keep banging and doing your thing. But, once that threshold is reached, its bye bye baby.
Day 20
Just go out an talk to girls. Seriously.
I have helped you create the confidence that is necessary to overcome a fear of approaching girls as well as learning how to deal with rejection.
It is time that you take your fates into your own palms. There is no secret to becoming good with females. It is constant practice. Even when you think you’ve figured it out, a month out of the game and you’re rustier than a ship on the bottom of the sea.
It’s time to build your own life experience and jump into the deep end. You see an attractive girl that walked past you, run up and start talking to her (When you run up, make sure you run up quickly enough so that you face her, never approach from behind her. Let her see your coming).
She may ignore you, she may dismiss you, or she may find your balls to be inspiring. Either way you shouldn’t care because her words and opinions have no bearing on you. You’re the commander in chief of your own world.
You may develop a fright and promise yourself that you will talk to the next one. Nay. Talk to the one that made you hesitant. Overcome your fear. Relish in it.
You will get rejected. But you will learn. You will have easy victories. Go for harder challenges.
God speed.
Tomorrow I’ll post up some resources that will help you on your path.
Day 19
A mistake that many youngin’s make is that they change their behavior when they start talking to attractive girls.
They give them more attention, they begin to enthusiastically nod their heads, and goofy grins abound. When talking to unattractive girls, this does not happen.
Girls that are attractive know this and are not amused. This is why a disinterested fellow becomes so much more intriguing.
She becomes quite distraught. Everyone else is treating her as a princess bee, but not this guy.
This is what happens:
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=piJGU50OFsw]
Mission:
Today’s mission is to get you to understand how you behave in front of unattractive girls, become concious of it and incorporate it to all girls you talk to.
Secret: Girl’s enjoy a chase as much as men. Give it to them. Make them work for their dinner. Make them question whether or not she actually has something worthwhile to offer.
She will thank you.
I want you to go to a place where people congregate with the hopes of meeting people and talk to the 6 most unattractive girls. This should be easy because if she’s in a group, her attractive friends will step out, believing that finally their ugly friend’s personality has shone through.
I want you to talk to them as if you were trying to pick them up. I want you to have in your mind the goal of getting her number.
While doing this, observe how your body is positioned. Memorize the feelings you are developing, disinterest, amusement, etc.
She may or may not be excited by your conversation. Some ugly girls know what they are and are defensive. Keep on treking.
*No beauty is not in the beholder. Sorry.*
Till tomorrow.
Day 18
There really aren’t that many “secrets” to building attraction with females. The best you can do is put your best persona forward and utilize techniques that build attraction. It is important to remember that there are other factors that may make or break your ability to get her back to the crib.
Sometimes girls just aren’t feeling it.
You may not be her type.
Her friends are being terrible friends by not allowing her to be alone with you.
Etc.
However there is one overarching truth to everything in life. We all want someone to pay attention to us. Enter the ADD method.
The ADD method is exactly what it sounds. You are paying attention to a girl and all of a sudden something shiny takes your focus away from her. This works particularly well if you have been holding strong eye contact and giving off vibes of “caring about her life.” Then boom.
You stare throughout the room. She begins to fight for your attention. Attraction. Keep it up.
Mission:
Let’s practice your ability to pay attention and then get distracted.
I want you to have at least 6 conversations today with someone. It doesn’t matter who, when, or where and be very engaged. Then at a moment, at the height of the other person’s spiel, just look away and keep your eyes focused off them. You will feel when the other person is feeling odd because their voice will begin to drop off.
Once that happens, turn back, smile, and ask a question that is irrelevant to the conversation. Topic change.
Pay attention to what they’re saying while you are not looking at them. Bring up something they said that interests you later on in the conversation. It will surprise them for they thought you weren’t paying attention. Powerful stuff.
Till tomorrow.
Day 17
The
The last two days you were busy opening your mouth to random females on the street. Granted it was an easy mission, remember that baby steps are crucial at this juncture of your life.
If you do not talk to strangers than you must rely on only your social circle for getting nookie. Free yourself of such constrictions.
Mission:
I will not lie to you. At the end of this program you will not be a “playa” or Rubirosa. What you will be is have been conditioned to feel comfortable in the world and in your own costume.
Do not fret I will give you tips at the end and resources.
Today you have another simple mission. I want you to go up to as many girls as you feel comfortable and ask them if they speak “English.”
Pretend as if you are a foreigner in a foreign land and you are searching for an English speaker. When the girl no doubt will say yes, keep the act up.
“OMG, I’m so happy to run into an English speaker, I haven’t been able to understand anything.”
Keep the ruse up until you can feel that she is getting bored. Then you can excuse yourself or keep talking to her.
If she doesn’t appreciate the “role-play” then simply bounce.
The goal here is to present an odd situation or even have her think you’re “odd” and see how long you can keep it up.
Till tomorrow.
