Today you begin your journey to learn how to talk to girls on the street.
Very simple mission for today and tomorrow. I know that some of you have never talked to a girl randomly on the street. I know that it a level of courage to walk up to someone you find attractive and make your mouth work.
Simmer down. Baby steps.
I want you to go up to a minimum of 40 females that you find attractive and ask them for the time.
It’s up to you how you approach them and how you get their attention. All you want is to know the time.
Wear a watch while doing this.
So you’ve slowly let your balls hang enjoying the wind. You’ve learned that rejection is something to not be feared. You have cleansed your emotional landscape.
You want to be the man that the world either wants to either be or be with.
Time to start dressing the part.
Girls will determine whether they want to talk to you based on your appearance. This is good for you since the majority of American guys dress like garbage.
Remember it is neither the clothes that make the man nor the man that makes the clothes.
Man and clothing are symbiotic.
Example of when a man makes good clothes look weak:
I’m not even going to bother dissecting this photograph. Just understand that this man has no respect for clothing and it shows.
Your job is simple. To examine your wardrobe and determine what may stay and what needs to go. This should not be painless for in reality if you stay away from the following items you will look better than the majority of guys.
1. No baseball hats outside of a game. Fitteds are alright since they’re fitted and those who wear fitteds take care of them. That means throw away that beat-ass Red Sox hat you’ve been wearing backwards since college.
2. No flip flops outside of a beach. Wear real shoes or fashion inspired sneakers.
3. Ditch cargo pants. Every guy on the East or West coast is rocking them.
4. No stripped shirts. I do not understand when this became the uniform for going out.
5. Invest in details girls notice, such as colored socks (never white) or ties and pocket squares.
It does not take much to look better as a man. The secret all comes down to fit and wearing what everyone else is not.
Example: Simple white T that fits you well, with jeans that have a good fit and are tapered, finished by engineer boots.
Now what most guys don’t understand is that if you buy quality it will last you a while and the money is worth it.
Are many surprised that I wear jeans that are more than $100 because I go selvedge or bust. Yes. Will these jeans survive 4 years and look better than bargain Walmart Lee’s. Definitely. Have females noticed. Obviously.
You do not need a huge wardrobe. You need a few essentials that will make you stand out.
Hell if you have the money start buying tailored suits. That is the most alpha uniform out there. Tailored, not ill fitting.
To determine if something fits you, look in the mirror. If it accentuates your natural form, superb. If it billows up, terrible. For those that have been wearing “loose” clothing for a while, clothes that are fitted may feel a bit tight. This is psychological.
If you’re fat, there’s no way to “hide it.” You’ll look fat, then buy things that are still relatively fitted but a little looser. More importantly treadmill status.
Here are a few websites to give you an idea. They’re top notch.
Yesterday you experienced rejection numerous times. It wasn’t that bad was it. Rejection is nothing but a few words and a look from a complete stranger who you do not know.
Never give strangers power over you. Today we will deal with something that many guys place too much value on. The ex.
If you never had a girlfriend or a girl that “broke your heart.” Consider yourself boss. Unless you never had a girlfriend because you are a fat slob. Then you need to work hard. Update those 300 pushups to 1000. Sweat.
Either way read this http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/nyc/589072628.html and come back tomorrow.
To those that have been “hurt” it is high time that you finally deal with this parasite that has been gnawing at your armor.
Today I want you to sit down and put pen to pad and write all the good times and the bad times. I want you to squeeze out every memory between you and her. Write it down. Record.
Then I want you to sit back, grab a beer, and think back to how pathetic you were in her presence. Yes I am judging you to have been pathetic. Otherwise you would have been over her.
Think of all the times you let your head rest on her shoulders. All the times you didn’t let her deal with her emotional tantrums on her own time, asking her “baby are you okay? can I get the Ben and Jerry’s for you.”
I need you to get rid of all the excess fat that was your relationship. So that when she does see your transformation you will not be tempted to let her back in.
Sex with her is fine. If she maintained her body. Relationship. Never again.
On to the next one.
Look deep into your emotional core and deplete it. Only then will you be able to continue unperturbed.
Today We will be entering the last leg of missions. In the beginning the missions were designed to get you out of your comfort zone and to realize the potential within you to be the bastion of gonadal fortitude.
Now it is time to realize that females are nothing to fear. Many guys have this deep insecurity that arises when they are in the presence of a female. This happens to some of the most powerful men in the world. They lose all their identity in the presence of breasts.
They supplicate and want to give gifts. The root of all this is fear of rejection.
Let us prove that rejection is no big deal. Now I can tell you to go forth and talk to a girl and then not worry that she rejects your advances.
No. We will kill the power of the rejection on your psyche.
Since today is Friday I want you to go forth into a social setting (bar if your over 21, mall or something) and locate the most attractive girl there.
Walk up to her and say the following:
“Hey, do me a favor and reject me.”
She will be confused, explain to her you want her to imagine that you hit on her and that she is rejecting your advances.
OMG. You’re talking to a female. Breath playa’.
She may be unamused and give you a half-assed “get away from me.”
I need you to be more forceful and ask her to be creative. Tell her to expunge all her rage on you.
When she does it to the point that you may feel odd inside, go forth and ask 4 more girls. Minimum of 5 rejections.
Take the power of rejection away and you no longer begin to fear it.
It will take a while for the consequences of rejection to mean nothing to you, however is the first step.
Alexander the Great is a great character of alphadom to study. Many would agree that his successes could simply be attributed to his belief that he was a conquerer.
He vehemently believed that he could conquer all and that the world could be subdued under his sword.
With this belief he took over the world.
There is another great story about Alexander that is not as popular. When he was dying he assembled is closest advisers and asked them for three last requests.
First he wanted doctors to carry his body in the funeral procession. Second, he wanted all the riches he accumulated to be laid out as a walkway for the funeral procession. Finally he asked that his arms hung at his sides during the procession.
He requested these three things to remind his soldiers and people of the three truths of life. Nothing can conquer death, not even medicine. You can not take anything with you when you die and it is pointless to chase riches. You come into this world with nothing and you leave this world with nothing. You can not carry anything with you.
Today I want you to keep the mindset of Alexander in your mind.
Sit down with pen and paper before you. Write of all your opportunities missed. Write of the moments which you passed for one reason or another. Write why did you pass them. Were you scared of doing something? Did your ex-girlfriend talk you out of it or made you do something else.
Remember what Alexander showed his people, death comes for us all and our material possessions will mean nothing. The only important facet of our lives is how we lived them. Have you been living?
After you have opened your eyes to the extent of living which you have forfeited begin to think of what kind of person you want to be.
Alexander wished to be a conqueror. He believed he was a conqueror. He lived as a conqueror. People felt his conqueror presence.
What do you wish to be. International playboy? Do you believe that you are one and have you been working towards attaining that title.
Take your time today to truly determine what you wish to become. No easy way out. You must start working towards that person. Everyday carry yourself as if you have already attained it.
Yesterday felt good didn’t it. Your aura making the masses move out of your way. The invisible hand of alpha clearing your path.
Today we seek to find inner peace.
The alpha-male has been given the rare gift of the “fuck it” attitude. While others worry about everything above and beneath the sun, the alpha-dog tends to look at life for what it is: a bitch that is always having puppies.
Things get bad, but they will get good. All good times will pass. Life doesn’t hate or love you, you are not a factor when it gets terrid or great, just happens.
There is no conspiracy against you. Stepping in dog feces will not bring money to your door.
The alpha looks at life simply for what it is: a challenge to his comfort.
If you drive I want you to get stuck in traffic.
If you live in a city I want you to take mass-transit during rush hour.
If neither of those options work for you, then place your self in a position that annoys you.
Once you find yourself in such an environment. Breath. Release all your anger. Boil until you find peace. Until you accept your fate.
You will only end up moving a foot in 13 minutes. People will push past you.
Once you accept such a fact you will begin to feel helpless to change your position. Good.
Accept your helplessness to make a difference in that moment and say to yourself “meh, fuck it.”
Welcome to zen.
Next time someone angers you, something annoys you, or things do not go your way. Remember this mission. Remember how no matter how much you bitched and moaned. How much you attempt to build indignant self-righteousness, there was nothing you can do.
Remember how when you realized that you were helpless and all your anger was used up, the calm that coated you.
From tomorrow on wear that coat of peacefulness. When people attempt to get a rise out of you, you are prepared. When life throws something wretched your way, you remember that all you must do is carry on and conquer.
Inner peace is the medicine to life’s ills.
Yes I understand that you will not attain it in one day. But you must attempt to find it from now on. There is nothing worse than an mind poisoned by irrational emotion. Clarity is a commodity.
I remember as a youngin’ being inspired a bio-pic about Moses. Particularly the scene where he raises his hands and parts the Red Sea. I had always wished such a power for myself.
Then when I was around 10 years old I saw a well dressed man walk through a crowd. The crowd parted to make room for him. I attempted to imitate him, but I had to use my hands to point people in what direction I wanted them to go.
Little known psychology fact, you can get people to move where you want them if you steer them with your hands. Humans for the most part are sheep.
Today you will learn and practice how to make crowds part for you. It is a sight to behold.
Today you need to go to a somewhat crowded area. Too crowded and people will have no where to go. The best is walking in the opposite direction of everyone else on a subway platform around rush hour.
The most important thing is to keep in mind that you are the ruler of your domain. Regal.
1. Walk straight, shoulders relaxed. Pretend as if you are an acrobat flying to the sky, holding onto your rope with your teeth. This should give your head up high.
2. Now slow down your pace dramatically. Think of yourself as slowly gliding through the crowd.
3. Make eye contact with people.
4. Be amazed as they walk out of your way. Those that are too busy staring at their phones or do not. Simply stop in front of them and wait for them to move. Unlike them, you are not in a rush.
5. You are not in a rush.
Keep at this for a while. It is amazing how slowing down and walking with confidence will lead others to part before you as you make your way.
Do this everywhere. Your grocery store, your college campus, social functions at your place of employment. Anywhere. Everywhere. Forever.
You have been given many missions in the last few days to prepare you for the challenges of attaining alphadom. I have pushed you to look people in the eye and start conversations with people you interact in a day to day basis. I have helped you implement new lifestyle changes and ways of thinking. I have given you the necessity knowledge to make your voice that commanding presence you yearned for.
Today we continue the journey. Each day creating a comfort zone that is far beyond the average man. Let us continue.
On Day 3 [http://michaelbyc.com/2011/05/18/day-3/] you were asked to talk to people you interact in your daily life, your bus drivers and coffee makers. We will continue along the same vein, except with 100% complete strangers.
I want you to talk to at least 10 people that you run into. This means that if you are on line, start a conversation with the person next to you. If you are in a bookstore start a conversation with someone walking by.
It is easier to talk to someone on line, but do not limit yourself.
You may wonder how you can start a conversation, simple. Open your mouth and move your lips. Remember you are not trying to impress anyone, but attempting to get over your fear of talking to people.
If they respond and continue talking, great keep working with it. If they ignore you or are brusque, do not fret. No loss.
Here is a technique that will help you in your mission, the perfect social smile.
1. Make eye contact with the person you want to speak with.
2. Do not smile immediately at someone. Take a few seconds to pause on their face (gaze power).
3. Let your smile shine through enveloping your entire face.
The few second pause is important because it makes the receiver feel as if it special for them. Remember that smiling all the time makes one look like an idiot. Smile in the beginning and sparsely through in smiles when you find amusement.
Talking to strangers is important because it will help you overcome your fear of unknown people and will allow you to grow to be more relaxed in all social situations. Tightness is the sign of fear. Lazily lounging is the symbol of strength and assurance in oneself. Keep practicing.
Checking in I hope that you have been continuing your pushup regiment, continually holding the gaze of others, as well as reminding yourself that the world is yours for the taking.
Yesterday you worked on your voice. It is an integral weapon in your arsenal of dominance. Today we will work on your ability to take up space.
Humans were never meant to sit. In fact there is a muscle that opens up to make defecating easier when you squat. When you sit it is tense making it harder than it should be.
From this point on you will attempt to never find yourself in a 90 degree position ever. Constantly be leaning back.
At first you will believe that this makes you look arrogant and pompous. Do not fret. Maintain your alpha mindset and soon you will be questioning yourself as to why you have not been sitting at as close to 180 degrees as possible.
Throw your feet up or spread your legs to let your balls breath. Start learning how to have your arm lean on something as you are sitting. Correction. You will never sit again, you will be constantly lounging. Similar to a lazy lion.
Incorporate this into your daily life. Ignore the looks of scorn or judgement. They are too fearful to attain the freedom that you now enjoy.
Remember it is the small things in our daily life that separate the alphas from the rest.
Let’s get to it. You have a busy day today.
You will learn how to utilize your natural gifts to the fullest. Today’s mission is to work on your voice and make it the commanding and respected tone that it has the potential to be.
This mission has been designed by my brother. Yes, alphadom is a family affair. More importantly he knows his stuff and you are all in for a treat.
Breathing- Place one hand on your stomach the other on your chest. Breathe through the nose making sure that the hand on your chest does not rise, but that the hand on your stomach does. This is diaphragmatic breathing or belly breathing and is vital to developing breath support. Before answering a phone or speaking to someone, take a breath. This will lower your voice. Be aware that when speaking you breathe mostly from the mouth in order to maintain your flow of speech. Avoid deep breathing. This only tenses up your body. Always be relaxed and breathe gently.
1. Tongue Stretching- Stick out your tongue as far as possible. Feel the stretch. Now return your tongue back inside your mouth and place the tip of the tongue behind your bottom front teeth. Now stretch your tongue forward feeling the back of the tongue stretch down into your neck.
2. Lip Loosening- Blow your lips making the sound of a motorboat. Go up a scale.
3. Yawn- making yourself yawn will stretch the muscles in your mouth.
4. Making Faces- Make retarded faces to further stretch the muscles in your face.
5. Take both of your thumbs and place them under your jaw and massage the area. ( above your Adam’s apple. Soft area under the tongue)
Locating Natural Pitch.
1. Close your lips and hum Umm- hmm. Make sure that you feel a tingling in you lips. Now count to 20 by humming. (Ex. umm-hmm one, umm-hmm two….umm-hmm twenty) Make sure that you say the numbers in the same pitch as the umm-hmm. This pitch is your middle range. All your resonators will work equally. Learn to speak at this pitch. This is the pitch that will give your perfect voice.
2. If you are not sure if you located your natural pitch. Stand up straight. Relaxed. place a finger in your sternum and in a staccato movement press your sternum while humming. You should feel a buzz around the mouth and nose. Now speak while pressing the sternum. Learn to use this pitch.
Resonance- The Quality of the Voice
1. Developing the resonance in your voice will give you a deeper more authority voice. Vital for an Alpha male. Resonance is what attracts women.
2. Stand relaxed against a wall. Now with your full vocal strength count to ten. As you count slowly move your head down until it touches the neck once you count to ten. Make an effort to have the back of your neck touch the wall. Restart the exercise with your head raised up and at the level position. Doing this ten minutes a day everyday will strengthen and lower your voice and develop your resonators. Using full vocal strength to count does not mean to shout.
3. Overcoming a nasal voice or any other type of voice (ex. husky or gravel voice) requires practicing locating your natural pitch and the resonance exercise. A person who has a nasal voice uses more of their nasal resonator then any other. Speaking at your natural pitch will allow all your resonators to work in unison. Practice.
1. Place a pencil in your mouth and begin reading tongue twisters or poetry that of Walt Whitman or Edgar Poe. (Well written language)
2. Read out loud. Notice the pace you read at. Notice when you run out of breath. are you monotone? Learn to read at a comfortable pace. Take time to breathe and make pauses. If you are monotone, practice reading a passage while singing the words to a melody. (ex. Happy Birthday) Monotone is a lack of emotion in the voice. If the story you are reading is sad, read it in a sad way. If the purpose of the writing is to inspire. Read it the way a general would to his soldiers.Visualize. It is all about emotion. Sinatra put emotion in every word he sang.
1. You should never lose your voice. A humans vocal chords are made so that they can speak 24/7 without ever losing their voice. If you do lose your voice it means you are not breathing properly or shouting. Never shout. Raise the volume of your voice if you want to be loud.
2. Americans think that lowering your voice will give you more authority. This is speaking from the throat to give you that broadcaster voice. This will only damage your vocal chords. Speaking in a sexy whisper creating a breathy Marilyn Monroe voice will do you harm as well. Establish and use your natural pitch.
1. Lisping- The tongue must always be behind the teeth. Do not allow the tongue to touch the teeth. Place your hand in front of your mouth and make an S sound. If you feel a strong air flow in the front of your mouth, you are pronouncing the S sound properly. The air flow should not come out of the sides of your mouth. Many who wear or had braces develop this habit.
2. Stuttering- Stuttering is mostly cause by fear. The Stutter believes that all speech most be perfect. Since the stutterer does not want to make a mistake while speaking he develops a habit of repeating the sounds of letters or words. When speaking many stutters become nervous causing their tongues and throats to tense up. This hinders proper breathing support and articulation. Many Stutters do not understand that every one at times pronounces things wrong or has a habit of saying Ahh, Umm. (Note. Avoid this Ahhs and Umms in speech. Instead substitute these brain farts with pauses. Your listener will be more interested in you since you look as if you really care about getting the right words to describe how you feel.) Overcoming stuttering takes time and patience. Get into the right frame of mind that what you have to say is important and that everyone makes speech mistakes.
1. To fix your stuttering- Practice speaking at a slower pace. Take your time with pauses and breaths and think about the words before you speak it. Allow your whole body to relax.
2. Ancient Method- Instead of putting pebbles in your mouth, put a handful of uncooked beans in your mouth. (If you start gagging, you put too many beans in your mouth.) Now start reading out loud. This will take your mind off the way your tongue is moving and also helps you with articulation.
1. Chewing gum in general is a great way to train the muscles in your mouth. Chew gum before giving a speech or presentation.
2. Understand that the voice you hear is not the same voice everyone else hears. Invest in a voice recorder and use it to pinpoint what you need to improve on in your voice.
3. Alpha dogs always speak at their own pace. Never rush. At times pause and establish rapport with your listener through eye contact. This will give you an aura of charisma. If your body language and posture is relaxed, so will your voice. Let every word that comes out of your mouth have meaning.