I have spent some time in Scandinavian culture. As a youngster I was fascinated by the thirst and strong-willed Vikings. I love few things, one of them Nordic mythology. Valhalla is what I imagined heaven to be. I believed that the Hoth like landscape of Scandinavia would have bred a society of strong willed pinnacles of masculinity. It was a heart wrenching moment when I learned that my perceptions of the Nordic people were of a day long ago. I anticipated meeting the society that produced Simo Häyhä. However, my eyes continue to be opened to the dark truths of life.
I never understood why my perception of the Nordic people was a polar opposite of reality.
Until I was introduced to Jante’s Law.
In 1933 Aksel Sandemose wrote A Refugee Crosses His Tracks. This Norwegian-Dane first developed Jante’s Law while writing about his home town. The 10 rules are as follow:
1. Don’t think that you are special.
2. Don’t think that you are of the same standing as us.
3. Don’t think that you are smarter than us.
4. Don’t fancy yourself as being better than us.
5. Don’t think that you know more than us.
6. Don’t think that you are more important than us.
7. Don’t think that you are good at anything.
8. Don’t laugh at us.
9. Don’t think that anyone cares about you.
10. Don’t think that you can teach us anything.
To summarize the laws: Do not be boastful and always downplay everything. If you have something I lack, do not mention it for you may “hurt my feelings”. Shut up. We are all equal and in this together. I’m too weak and lazy to stand on my own two feet. Please stand near me so I can lean on you.
Scandinavians follow these bullshit precepts without prompting. It’s been instilled in them through society. Drive for success has been systematically crushed in the youth. Spines of Wonder Bread.
Do not stand out. Individuality is a terrible thing and we must do what is good for the group. Communism.
This goes against everything our genetic heritage has instilled in us. Furthermore this goes against everything success is built upon.
As a demigod once educated: “Some of you may remember that in my early days, I was sort of a bleeding heart liberal. Then I became a man and put away childish ways.” Wisdom.
Evidence: As far as I can tell Scandinavian countries haven’t invented anything useful since 1932 when the LEGO toy company was created (before 1933 when Jante’s Laws were officially written). All the Scandinavians have done is create a world where parents have been replaced by the government. This is disgusting. A society that does not support individuality and attempts to create curbs on people enjoying their success is a society that is for the weak minded.
Recently I went to a techno concert which featured Swedish DJ Basshunter. He brought dudes on stage. My friend Anna was bewildered. She lost respect for him as a man. This is what they’re raising up north. Eunuchs.
Here is an article on how Swedish people end up dating [Dating in Sweden: sex, booze, and mobile phones] Hint it requires copious amounts of booze and both boy and girl acting like girls.
Look at Jante’s Laws, memorize them, and then do the opposite of what they preach. I challenge all that believe that Jante’s Laws are worthwhile towards the success of a society and the personal success of becoming a man.
A man that does not challenge is a slave. A man that does not believe in his own worth is a slave. A man that is afraid to laugh at someone is a slave.
You must do everything in your power to separate yourself from the masses. There is honor in being better, smarter, more skilled, more driven than your neighbor. The Greeks, purveyors of democracy, math, art, anal, and columns gave us tales of Heroes. Odysseus.
Many cower. Few have the fortitude to take on the world and subdue it under the inner power of man.
Here is a list of people that would not have had helped make the world better if they were born in a Scandinavian country today.
Leonardo da Vinci
Jack “Howling Mad” Churchill
How the Vikings would bemoan their progeny
If you want your girlfriend to continue expending energy on you there is are a few courses of action. However the most potent of them is the cultivation of vices. Many will tell you that girls do not want a womanizing, boozing, and cigar smoking bastion of masculinity in their lives who eats steaks while she regales her figure with salad. These are either the boys that still believe that doing “favors” for a girl will have her respect him while she skips from one disinterested stud to another or they are the self-deluded spinsters that engross themselves in ten-cent romance novels or are angry that a man will not look at them. Meow.
Here is a secret to what a girl wants from her man.
A guy who is a finished product, but has something that she thinks she would like to change in him. However, she really doesn’t want to change him, she just enjoys the perception that she can make him better. Confusing.
Here’s another secret: girls are counterintuitive.
A girl wants a guy who has his mission determined. A guy who appears in her life gift-wrapped with an alpha-dog seal of approval. If you have been reading this blog then you already know what this looks like.
However a girl is never fully happy with something until she has added her pointless flair that serves no purpose beyond making her feel that she did contribute something. Vanity.
The same applies to boyfriends; she will attempt to add her touch until she enslaves you with the shackles of curbed individuality. A girl doesn’t want her man to concede to her whims. Allowing her to change you into what she believes she wants will only breed disgust, contempt, girl’s nights where she mocks you in front of her friends, and daydreams of foreign cycloptic pythons.
The easiest way to avoid this is never to have a relationship officially determined. Open-ended bliss. If you have determined monogamy the easiest way to avoid her goal of “customizing” you is to cultivate a vice.
A vice gives her something to focus her attention on. Vices tend to be frowned upon by the gatekeepers of propriety. In a society that continually attempts to move to the vanilla and sterilized showing your girl that you refuse to bend to the whims of the haters will enlighten her spirit and embolden her in the bedroom. Remember she doesn’t want to change you, just enjoys believing that she can “make you better.”
How to determine if something is a vice: if something is made illegal because of the “negative” impacts it may have on children, it is seen socially as a vice. This relates to smoking, boozing, womanizing, salting your food, and illegal cage fighting. Avoid the vanilla and sterile life.
I would like to make a point here that a vice is not an addiction. If you become an addict you have shown you lack the mental constitution to have a vice. With a vice you are toeing the line between enjoyment and succumbing to artificial stimulation. Remember what you learned watching mob movies: nothing ever ends well once you start doing coke. Also there is almost nothing more despicable than a degenerate gambler. Facts.
I personally am a fan of the triquetra: Gambling, Boozing, and Cigars. It inspires lesser men to join your ranks while giving your girlfriend enough things to complain with empty words. It is a safe entrance into the world of vices and if you just stick with these three there is nothing to be ashamed of. To imagine that back in the days of our grandfathers, the triquetra was part of the masculine definition. How have we as a nation become such pussies. Sigh.
However, do not limit yourself. It is important to remember that your vices will make her friends speak of you with the tones reserved for villains. This is good. Remember girls are counterintuitive. The more her friends remind her that you may be a bad influence the more attracted she will become to you.
Be creative in your vices.
My father cannot help himself and flirts in front of my mother. Her eyes shine with attraction.
A close friend of mine goes out into the night stumbling into his lover’s bed in the early morning. Her friends throw mean spirited comments at him while attempting to have her see the light. His relationship with her is stronger and more potent than any relationship of her friends.
Remember men have vices, girls have “guilty pleasures” such as chocolate or stuffing their mouths. Vices make men more attractive, guilty pleasures uncurbed will make girls visually unappealing.
A few years ago the mextrosexual phenomena was born. Grown men co-opting the rituals of females and shouting from the roof-tops that pruning of eye-brows was on the same masculine level as skinning a bear and wearing the hide as a coat. The Edge 1997.
I will admit that I was one of the first to show scowl and eyes of disgust to the immaculately maintained males. I was born into a household where masculinity was defined by calloused hands and pelt on chest. We only shaved our face to separate oneself from beast. Barely.
As many of my fellow men continued their verbal crusade against the metrosexual, I decided it was high time to study this societal curiosity. What I did notice is that their females were highly groomed and maintained. Archimedes smiled down upon me.
The metrosexuals inadvertently inspired their female’s behavior by appealing to a primal female programing: always attempt to one-up.
If you look at a group of girls they are always attempting to outdo the other. Prom Syndrome. Hot girls create hot girls because they are in constant competition with each other. If one girl gives you a lot of attention it is guaranteed her friend or another girl will give you even more attention to outdo the previous.
For a long time I believed that this was only applicable to females. How could a man inspire a girl to be better by simply being a man. The only option a man had was to inspire jealousy in a female through another female.
Then from the heavens Prometheus returned and through metrosexuals gave a new gift to man.
Inspire jealousy in your female simply by being a better specimen than she is.
If you want her to dress better, to ditch the Uggs and sweats then you must outdo her. A girl always wants to shine next to her man, make her exhume doldrums and watch her wardrobe become awe-inspiring.
Do everything in your power to become a better more enviable example. If she ignores your ascension there is only one verdict: she does not worry about losing you or appearing raggedy in your presence. Disrespectful. Unacceptable.
Here are a few tidbits to inspire your female to inspire her to be on your level. [This is for a girl that you are dating, have noticed that she has stopped trying to appear at the pinnacle of her abilities and you still like her. Otherwise I would suggest to evacuate and on to the next one.]
1. Before washing yourself with soap or body wash, scrub your skin with plain white sugar. Do this in the water and do not fear the syrup that will be created. Washing yourself with sugar will make your skin soft as well as exfoliate to create unblemished flesh. This is due to the coarseness of the sugar crystals.
Do not wash your face with white sugar. If you want to soften your face use brown sugar, however the weathered look is something I would strive for.
2. Wash your teeth with a bristle brush. I personally feel that my teeth are getting a deeper cleaning with natural bristles, however this is not the point of washing your teeth with one. Females go through your belongings, especially in the bathroom where they have privacy. Having a natural bristle brush will raise questions and have her ponder exactly why you have such a specialized piece of grooming material.
3. Before going to bed dab your lips in olive oil. This will make them soft. She will notice. Her mind will go into overdrive and she will begin to wonder if hers are as well.
4. Most importantly point out what you hate in other girls. Discuss your dislike in the footwear a girl is walking to the tacky hairband. Many girls believe that men are oblivious to anything on a girl beyond face, tits, ass, and legs. Show her that this thought process is wrong. Have her wonder whether you offer eyes of appreciation or judgment.
Ignore the liberal feel good, let us all live on rainbows and eat moon pies drivel; that you should like your partner for who they are and not what they look like. No.
Metrosexuals without knowing were inspiring their females to compete with them and in the process created a girl that went above and beyond the average girl. It is with heavy heart I begrudgingly offer them respect for enlightening me.
Remember everything in moderation. Soft skin is only acceptable if your body has been forged in the fires of physical training and strict dietary regime. Soft lips only on a visage of steely gaze and veins of ice.
Scenario: I am sitting at a table with a few acquaintances and the topic turns to something mundane, such as what should have U.S. policy been after World War II in regards to the Soviets, pre Soviet possession of a nuclear bomb, in order to keep them out of Eastern Europe. Mental masturbation.
Everyone looks towards me for my opinion. I reply “nuke ‘em.” Laconic.
I receive a few glimmers of amusement from some of the group as well a few shocked faces. However there is that one person who believes their intellect to be superior; the person who attempts to shame you with condescending vernacular. They look upon you with fleeting glares of both indignation and indigestion. Cheeks begin to rouge. Flop sweet begins to form. The transformation is instantaneous. From a perch of superiority to spittle spewing simpleton.
I of course lean back, smirk firmly planted on visage, and look with unforgiving eyes. The words “naïve, fool, villain” that are thrown at me do not blemish my demeanor.
Those around the table look upon the display before them with wonder. The rage that is emitting and directed at me is palpable. I am unperturbed. The more frenzy bound for me the more amusement I experience.
I can read the mind of my aggressor. He is wondering why I do not see his point of view. He is baffled as to why I am not swayed by his superior logic and book smarts. He cannot comprehend why I do not see the truth that he is blessing me with, how he are pulling me from the pits of ignorance.
Finally the only question that matters to him is “why is he not moved.”
If you have been reading this blog or following the Great role models of masculinity you would discover they have flesh of Tungsten.
Nothing shows weakness greater than the loss of composure. The moment you allow someone or something to get underneath your skin, you open your self to the possibility of being decorticated. Once the claws have pierced through your being they will continue to tear through until nothing is left but a pathetic husk.
All the time spent to develop an alpha mindset. Wasted.
All the work, day in and day indoctrinating yourself to proper dominant body language. For naught.
Those that saw you crumbling will look upon you as a poseur. You will find it a challenge to prove that your walls were not built upon sand.
Many of you may fashion yourself to be intelligent. To you it may appear foolish and daunting to not respond and argue your point of view. Why would you not present your evidence and superior logic if theirs is based on fallacy.
The answer is simple. Who cares.
Only one person truly cares about your feelings, point of view, aspirations, fetishes, and that person is you. The only person that may attack anything that you hold dear are your enemies. Why offer them the oppertunity.
That is what happened to me in the above scenario. I was lazily leaning at a table of peers and one of the boys felt that I was a threat to his ability to lure the cute girl away. Of course he became confrontational when I expressed my half hearted view. Proving me inferior would show his superiority to the cute girl with long gleaming hair.
While I remained with smirk and low body temperature, Vesuvius began preparing for its eruption. During his rant I pulled out my phone and set my alarm for the next day. 7:30: Champion Breakfast. His irritation grew. Smoke billowed and I only shared a curious glance.
Eventually I grew tired of his tirade I excused myself, smiled at the girl and made my exit. Oppertunities do not wait. After my departure I learned he did not stop talking about me and claiming how ignorant and ill-bred I was.
People were colder to him from that point on. Warmer to me. Coincidence. Nay. Expected.
Never lose your composure. Whether it is an enemy, friend throwing around claims with abandonment, or a lover, always remain in the alpha-dog frame of mind.
You must remember that you are creating the world in your image. You have the ultimate power over yourself.
People, especially the haters, want to see you out of your element. They wish for you to stumble so they may be there to kick you down and bury your face with the soles of their shoes. To discount this true nature of humans is to succumb to the fallacy of the hippie. Continually live Shot Gun Heavy.
If someone kidnapped your loved ones they expect you to lose composure and make foolish mistakes. Never wear your heart on your sleeve. Eternal mental exercise.
What is more dangerous: an animal with its back to the wall that acts out of desperation or one that looks upon you with calculating gaze.
Becoming an alpha male, when not one naturally, is a daunting task. Boys in the Western world in particular are constantly indoctrinated as females and their natural male instincts to run around and fight with one another are demonized. Boys are then told that they are all as unique and special as their fingerprints. They are told that their opinions and lives are important in the grand scheme of things. Heh.
Nothing could be further from the truth. Society has lied to all these boys. Most likely because boys that separate themselves from the pack bring instability.
Boys have been told how to bag a nice girl. Their mothers pushed them towards rewarding girls with gifts and acts when these girls have done nothing yet to warrant any rewards. Girls learn early on that they can get a boy to do almost anything for them and abuse this privilege. These boys eventually grow into either naïve romantics or become bitter and disgusted with females.
Boys have been told that it is necessary to tip-toe around what are seen as “taboo” subjects. We mustn’t offend anyone because everyone’s feelings are important. Fallacy. Opinions mustn’t be dangerous or able to ignite the flames of discourse. Avoid anything that may come off as any type of ‘ist. Boys are told that it is better to be vanilla than spumoni. Argue according to the handbook or be cast out.
Boys are told that there is a lifestyle that is acceptable. There is a time-line that must be followed. Any divergence from this and you are hedonist who cares nothing for their own family and community. Blasé.
Boys are told that there are “good guys” and this is how they look.
However some boys look at the greats such as Washington, Patton, Berlusconi, Presley, etc and begin to wonder if what they’re told is true.
The Greats do not bend over for girls. They act kindly because either the girl has earned such an honor or because they do it for their own amusement. They do not treat girls as mythical and moral creatures that will solve all their inner turmoil. Nay they treat them as they treat everyone else, with shit-eating grins.
The Greats hold opinions contrary to the populous. They defend their opinion with zeal and steely gaze. They are denounced for their views, but this does not bother them. Having strong convictions is all they require to succeed. They do not fear to put gasoline on the embers of discussion. They may be reviled for their thoughts, but they earn a begrudging respect by the marshmallow spined majority.
The Greats live a life that appeals to them. They have one model, their own. They do not copy anyone else. They want a wife, they find a wife. They want multiple girlfriends, they build a harem. They wish to travel the world with a sleeping bag and a few camping pots, they take the trip. Freedom.
If you are not a natural alpha-male than you must shed the fat of society’s expectations. It is a difficult process that requires intense work and a belief that there is something better beyond the beliefs of the vox populi.
There are two forms of bacon. There is the cold bacon you buy in a supermarket. It is coated with a layer of fat. It is bland, unappetizing, and soft.
However with a little fire the bacon sheds its fat layer and takes form. It begins to separate itself from the other stripes of bacon, becoming its own shape and taking on a delicious taste and texture.
Make a choice: to live coated in fat or shed it.
Look at Rainn Wilson utilizing the alpha-dog pose. Examine his face. There is no goofy grin nor shinning eyes. He stares at the camera with a steely gaze and you can tell his veins are full of ice.
He is out of shape and almost fully nude with a teddy bear covering his boulders and spearhead of masculinity. He is not what we are told a man should appear and yet here he is before us, trumpets proclaiming his masculinity. Roses held as a conquering sword.
Peek to his left, the reader’s right. What poses before us but one of the most desirable girls in the world. Her toes pigeon-toed and her body leaning into him. Her arm is drapped over his naked shoulder while his arms appear no where near her.
Wilson shows no desire in his eyes for her and she knows not how to respond. She attempts to meekly rectify this. She is out of her element, a girl used to men fawning over her, hoping to touch her youthful skin and dream of her lips enveloping.
Can he hold his alpha demeanor or will he succumb to a more beta attitude. Will he let her conquer him with her seductive prowess or will he maintain the alpha frame of mind: not impressed by beauty alone.
His shroud of alphadom shredded to a rag by the winds of weak mindset. His face breaks out in goofy smile and his head tilts with hopes of experiencing her fragrance. Desperation.
He will become self-conscious of his manhood, cloaking it with flowers. Boulders reduced to pebbles. Deflation.
Her eyes are not filled with the mirth. She is filled with disappointment. She thought she found a man who would become her rock with mindset immune to her beauty, charms, and bullshit. Tragedy.
With another man conquered, she will continue her search for a one who she can not defeat, a man with an oaken spine.
Stay strong my friends.
Since younglings, my brother and I were raised with this family philosophy: Do you know how to count. Count on yourself.
This does not mean that my family would not be there to offer support if I needed it. Nay. What this family motto merely conveys is that in the journey that is life you must rely on yourself to accomplish what you set out to do. Sasurai Samurai.
In life there is one thing that you have: presence of self. It can be your greatest asset or your greatest hurdle. It is the contrivance that will either allow you to gaze upon the world from the highest peak with sword at rest and a face full of content or lay bloodied and broken as another carcass in the Potter’s field of mediocrity.
These are three seemingly innocuous words that are thrown with carelessness truly denote the strength of character necessary to become an alpha-male.
In order to succeed one need to look internally. One must determine how strong they truly are and what they need to do to become tough enough to attain the life they wish for themselves.
This is a difficult process. I remember when I looked at the belly of my own glossy veneer.
I learned that at that moment I was not special. I was not skilled or talented. I was nothing but a boisterous braggart who knew nothing of the world’s machinations.
I discovered that my polished marble walls were built upon sand.
I had no plan of what I wanted to become. I was lazily floating through life without purpose. I took the path of least resistance. Instead of growing into a towering oak able to resist the tempest, I was nothing more than a weed; a parasite that was as easily forgotten as plucked.
I learned that I relied too much on the approval of others. I was a chameleon, molding myself to mimic the people I was around. My thirst for approval was gut-wrenching. I played it safe with head furiously nodding in conformity. I lacked opinions carved in diamonds and shared only agreements splayed with sweet tongue.
I acted upon impulse. I allowed my emotions to dictate my life. I did not understand the beauty of withholding gratification. I was easily baited and due to my impetuosity kept my head downwards in humiliation.
I allowed girls to dictate my actions. I allowed another’s words moisten my eyes.
The beginning of any path is to first do an inventory of self.
Only when I did mine was I able to know what I would need and procure it.
In the last few months I have dramatically recalibrated myself. Alphadom is a constant process. It is a struggle to maintain. Many former alpha’s have fallen under the strain. Living an alpha lifestyle is similar to having an expensive car. The benefits are immediate: social agility, superior mindset, and spine carved out of oak. However, as with a car the costs of maintenance are hidden and expensive.
I myself have struggled with the challenges of avoiding the slip and slide towards mediocrity. This has led me to create my current lifestyle regime.
In recent weeks I have done an intensive study into evolutionary biology and psychology. I was first spurred by the famous Paleo-Diet (http://paleodietlifestyle.com/). The diet is based on eating like a caveman. After my own research into evo-bio and psych I began to realize that I needed to turn to my hunter/gatherer ancestors for the ultimate maintenance of alphadom. 2 million year warranty.
Our bodies are the display cases of our mindset. One can judge a person by their appearance and be quite accurate in their assessment. What is on the inside translates to the outside. Truth. Hair is a natural indicator of health. As are symmetrical faces. Survival instincts.
The caveman lifestyle gave our ancestors powerful bodies. There were no chairs to sit on and do finance. There were beasts to be hunted and dwellings to protect. The human body is an engineering masterpiece and cavemen knew how to sustain it.
I have been on this diet for two months and the results have been staggering. I have reached the point where I can make out the veins upon my torso. Furthermore I have more energy and my mind has not been clouded by lethargic musings. I run like a Patek.
The caveman diet is based on eating foods that were accessible during the times of originals. This means that gluten, milk, and fruits are done with.
I eat whenever and whatever amounts I want as long as I follow these guidelines:
Acceptable: vegetables, meat, nuts, fruits (but not too much)
Unacceptable: pasta, grains, dairy, beans and legumes, sugar
Liquid of choice: Water, I can never drink enough of it.
I have included a cheat day which for me is Saturday when I allow myself to eat and drink (booze day) whatever I want. The rest of the 6 days of the week I stay within the guidelines set forth. Bing it for more details.
I have come to believe that the human body was designed to accomplish tasks in a certain way. This has caused me reevaluate how I work out.
I train Muay Thai not only for self-defense reasons, but I have come to realize that it is the closest I will come to the modern day equivalent of joining in a hunt. Muay Thai utilizes the entire body and puts your mind in a combat mindset, similar to our ancestral hunters.
Our ancient forefathers did not lift heavy rocks and weird patterns. I follow the same rules. While they had carcasses of beasts and perhapse tree trunks, I use a combination of my own body weight and weights at the gym.
The exercises that I do are: knuckle pushups, pull-ups, squats, deadlifts, and the bench press. I have broken everything down to compound exercises of the pushing or pulling variety.
I no longer run long distances. I only sprint. The human legs were designed to sprint and not marathon running. I do the same with a regiment of running HIIT.
Dearest readers you must take a moment and pause. While we have accumulated knowledge we have sacrificed survival skills. Yes the ancients were intelligently inferior to us, however they were able to pass on the genes that allow us to be enter the world two millennia later.
We have been stupidly told to live everyday as if it was our last. Live like that and you cannot survive tomorrow. The Cavemen were wiser. Live for tomorrow, but remember you could die tonight. Partial clairvoyance. This is why we have farming today, the Caveman mindset preparing for tomorrow.
Advice: Avoid credit card debt.
I have begun to think as a caveman. Man can plan, but life constructs. I no longer allow myself to become excited even with a sure thing. I do not allow my emotions to take hold and instead opt for Arctic levels of calculation.
Cavemen knew that life is a bitch and she is always having puppies. They did not allow this to break their spirit.
Cavemen knew that the females are searching for the best resources and genes available. This is why humor is directly correlated to levels of testosterone. Jezebel fans: Humor is a male trait and it helps us in the sexual marketplace. So is building civilizations and developing cures. Success and renown: aphrodisiac.
Cavemen knew that predators were both inside and outside the tribe. They learned to trust their family and few friends. Veins of ice, love of blood.
I am happy to report that my alpha presence is at all times high. My body has been running at peak conditions. Furthermore my T levels have been through the roof causing my motivation to sky rocket. I am living a lifestyle that the haters cannot process. Scoreboards do not lie.
Alpha tip of the day: B12 vitamins.
I have spent my summers pursuing work that most college students avoid. While they scurry into climate controlled boxes, I seek employment closer to calloused hands and weathered skin. Their lips become moist with water from a cooler in the break room. My parched throat sated with sweat. Many of my employers, while thankful for my labor, would be curious as to why I sought out exertion that many of my peers would consider “beneath” them. I have worked on Green roofs in the scorching NYC sun and swept the sidewalks in front of multimillion dollar homes in Georgetown. The answer I give them is twofold: pecunia non olet and experientia docet stultos.
One of the most life-changing jobs that I have held is being a deckhand on a dinner ship that sailed through NYC harbor. It was during this time that I truly began to study the Lifestyle of the alpha. I applied for the job sometime in April or May and received a callback the day I was let go from another labor intensive job.
Fact: I was let go because I finished the project ahead of schedule. Productivity=unemployment. Life laughs at us all.
I went to my interview and discovered that there were 8 candidates for 2 spots. My interview went well and I was quite sure that I was the only candidate that was receiving a college education. I received a call back and after a drug test was formally part of the team. During my first two weeks I was not truly allowed into the fold. I simply wrote it off as being the new guy and kept my head down and did my work better than anyone.
For those interested I spent most of my time cleaning toilets and urinals. Sometimes I was asked to help the First Mate since I earned my status as the best. I left that job with my first stripe and was informed if I stay I would be a captain. There were times where I would work back to back shifts. Get there at 4:30 p.m., leave at 12:30 a.m. get home at 1:30 a.m. and have to be back at 7a.m. the next morning. The Grind.
Eventually my productivity, lack of complaining, and simply not being a “fuck-up” became noticed. There was a seminar where all the new workers were required to attend. During this seminar they asked who had memorized their “courtesy cards” (This was a card given to staff to remind us to smile at guests and do everything in our power to have them enjoy their stay. The work of overpaid consultants). I was the only one that did. I went up to the front, recited it, and earned twenty dollars.
The next day when I come to work one of the First Mates comes up to me and begins a conversation. I keep my mouth shut and keep doing my work as he’s overseeing me. Eventually he states:
“Your dad must be proud of you huh. Being the only person to memorize their card and on the ship’s crew. Usually the restaurant people are the ones who impress the ones running the seminars.”
(There was an unofficial competition between the people who work the vessel and the people who work for the restaurant)
Everything began to make sense. Everyone thought I was related either to the people who ran the company or one of the captains. They all knew that I was in college and none of them could believe that a white kid in college would clean toilets for $10.25 an hour.
To clarify: I was the only white kid who worked for this company that was not in the office or a ship’s captain. I was the only one who had any history of college who worked as a deckhand or first mate. I was the only one who didn’t have a possible criminal history.
Everyone thought I was a mole. That I quickly dispelled such thoughts and gained high levels of respect. I became one of the guys.
This was the moment that would begin to define my life from here on out. To those that have not had the pleasure of working a low wage manual job I implore you to take the plunge for a few months. I’ve worked in an office environment. Everyone is prepared to backstab to get a promotion or maintain false visages in fear of HR. Not so low-wage labor.
You join a secret society hidden from the prying eyes of corporate. Here you gather together and share stories, off-colored jokes, and learn how to hold your own amongst weathered men. You become part of tribe and are open to a world that the white-collared will never understand.
It was once I gained entrance into this tribe that I first began to learn the ins and outs of females and becoming an alpha-male. My father was a great experience, but what kid truly pays attention to their parents from 13-19 years of age. Stupidity of youth. The guys would share their stories and exploits. I had nothing to add at the time and thus my ears were constantly at attention. German-Sheppard Method.
It was during this time I learned how to holla at Latinas. I began taking mental notes on how the other guys would flirt with the customers and female wait staff. Brazen fearlessness emitting off them. Any moment was the right moment to flirt. Opportunity Costs. The greatest teachers I had during this time was one of the first mates that was on my vessel. Let us refer to him as Vin.
Vin was one of my earliest role models during my college years. He was a no bullshit Puerto Rican that smoked Black and Milds. Everyone deferred to him, even the older guys. Once Vin found out that I was one of them, he took me under his wing. I think having a white kid as a protégé was hilarious to him. I wouldn’t know, he only smiled at females. Visually laconic.
I will fully admit that my avoidance of smiling is due to Vin. He would just communicate with you via facial expressions. It was the greatest thing I had witnessed. Vin taught me everything I knew about tying down the vessel, maintaining the engines, etc. He always held me up to a higher standard than everyone else. He once told me that as a smart kid I can’t be fooling around with “fuck-ups”. I hold this advice very dear.
Vin gave me my first insight into how a man interacts with females. I was like any other high school guy: trying things and praying that a girl would fall for it. I did not have any structure or plan, only Hail Mary’s. Vin was a master of seduction, with calibrated technique and sharp shooter mindset. Every guy working on the boats were in awe of him. He was only 27 and in a matter of 2 years working for the company had taken to bed almost every girl. Record Breaking.
This is a guy who had a girlfriend working in the office and “driving” one of the cute waitresses home whenever their shifts coincided. One time he had me deliver a letter to a girl. I messed up and gave the letter to the wrong girl. Even after the firestorm that ensued he kept his cool and prevailed. #Winning.
My foray into a serious study of alphadom started that summer. I was lucky enough to have a certified boss take me under his wing and show me the ropes. It was during that summer that I learned how to truly maintain a presence under any pressure. I was introduced to the psyche of females. It was that summer that I learned that nothing is owed to me and that my own toil will save me.