Behind the kind eyes and the boo-boo kisses and the protective embrace of your mother lies a selfish prerogative that was established in the days when our kind first discovered fire.
The reason girls want children is twofold. Yes your mother was genetically programmed to continue the noble act of passing forth the strongest genes and to create a great species. Dignified. However, there is also a more selfish reason for her wanting progeny to take care of her in old age. Foresight.
Your mother wants you to be an “alpha male.” It is in her best interest. My predominantly male dissenters will decry me. They will shout with outrage. They will snarl with contempt as they attempt to slice through the veil of verity that hangs before them. Their arms will flail since the swords required to pierce through are heavier than the poorly made ceramic mugs that are their dumbbells.
These boys (and the girls who have been blinded by lies) will sulk and seethe refusing to believe the true definition of a Mama’s boy: one that is good with girls who stands above the mediocrity.
It has come to my attention that many who read the LIFESTYLE find me revolting for the simple fact that I attempt to over-simplify the world before us. Occam’s Razor.
They believe that the title of alpha-male is a social construct used to bring despair and inequality into the world. I ask them to turn to the animal kingdom where males fight for dominance and female attention. We have not outgrown our animalistic impulses: see survivors of natural disasters. Lifing.
These same critics of this worldview harp that I am misogynistic, sexist, perhapse even unattractive because I separate males and females instead of binding them under the false prophet of “equality of ability.” I turn their attention to the beauty of childbirth. I am sure that these male detractors can easily and truly empathize with the pain associated with the noble gift.
It is these peons that lack respect for the very natural instincts that have allowed our species to survive. Naiveté. It is only through my immersion in Behavioral Biology that I first had my eyes opened to our mother’s greatest hope for her male child: alphadom.
Let us think in the simplest terms, survival. A male that was good with females was able to pass on his genes through a larger delivery system. Harem-style Jujitsu. In order to have access to the most females the male had to have resources as well as be desirable. He needed confidence to fight the dangers of the world as well as be a leader of men in hunting expeditions.
The same traits girls find desirable today were found desirable in yester-year. Progress. The strongest genes are the most desirable and they happen to be the ones that crafted alpha-males. Remember it was not all physical based as proven by the smart guys who figured out how to entice girls had their brainpower passed on. Balance
Nerds rejoice, you exist due to the same factors that allowed brawn to survive. Use it instead of masturbating to tentacle porn.
We discovered why your mother wants you to be good with girls, to pass on the genes her ancestors worked hard to cull, but why does she want to you be at the top of your game. It can not be because she only wants what is best for her little boy. No. She wants you to provide for her.
In the olden days life was tenuous and even to this day girls live longer. Survival in our modern world is harder than it previously was. In the days of yore survival was a warm cave and food. Now there are bills to pay. Husbands die out. Sons live on.
Your mother wants her son to have a lifestyle from which will also allow her to live off. Unless your father and mother’s combined assets were large, you will need to support your parents later on if you are a true alpha-dog and not an asshole. You will have your own expenses with most of your income going into travel and an envy-inspiring lifestyle.
You’ll need extra paper to take care of your mother.
Yes. Your mother worked tirelessly in the hopes that you will be able to make her proud. She wants to brag to her friends about the success that is you. She wants to know that you can pass on her legacy whenever you truly wish.
Girls are competitive.
Now you may ask yourself why mothers coddle their children from the dangers of the world. Why did your mother tell you lies and misdirect you in how you should entice girls. Why she told you that the right girl will like you for the real you.
She was testing you. I too once believed the words my mother told me. Thankfully I quickly learned and by Middle School had sharpened my people-watching skills while learning in the wild. I would spend the next few years tirelessly perfecting my craft. Discovering to do the opposite of what my mother told me and witnessing success.
Today I can see the proud gaze my mother places upon me when another girl at the grocery store allows her eyes to linger upon me or when I flirt in front of her.
She knows that I passed the test she set before me and that the future of the world is secure from her end.
Dear male readers. Girls throw challenges your way. It never stops.
I see it when my mother does it to my father.
I see it when girls I am friends with throw them my way and we are not even involved.
You will constantly be tested in your alphaness by the girls you encounter. Fact of Life.
You must conquer these examinations. Your mother wants to put your A (A for Alpha-dog) on the refrigerator so that her friends can look at what their sons could have been.
Don’t let your mother down. She is less forgiving than the world.
I am quite a fan of Russian people. Though I abhor their political system and the farce that is their judiciary, I give the people credit. They live in what essentially equates to a third world outside of St. Petersburg and Moscow and yet they keep on truckin’.
While the West in particular looks upon Russia’s environment of masculine display as the lifestyle of an unenlightened people, I find many important lessons.
It’s unsurprising that the doe-eyed politically correct men who beg girls for hugs at rallies to help the underprivileged would be disgusted by the hairy chested Russian men who believe that success is dependent on self and that unabashed flirting with sexual undertones is acceptable.
Feminists cringe at Russia as well; to them Russia is the child of Eastern Europe that cannot be saved. No matter how hard they wish to teach, the Russians are unwilling to learn the true path. Tragedy.
American feminism has taught girls that men should love a girl, not for her looks, but for her accomplishments, career, intellect, and terrible impersonations of porn dialogue in the bedroom.
There was a strategic D-Day to replace the mother from Leave it to Beaver with Rosie the Riveter as the girl who all men will want to bed. Perusing the body of a girl with shapely legs, proportional breasts, and enticing eyes was scandalous, the sign of a man who was uncivilized. What straight guy wouldn’t want to sleep with a welder?
In Soviet Russia the story was different. Girls and men dressed the same. Equality reigned for decades. Then the wall fell and communism was dealt a final blow via: a leader who wore rose-tinted glasses and a no-nonsense Teflon President.
In case you missed the reference, the communist party tried to have their own Jimmy Carter. Outstanding.
Russian girls threw away their overalls and replaced them with short skirts. Heels transformed into the only acceptable shoes, to dance in as well as traverse the icy wastelands that make Hoth appear hospitable.
Russian faces that were previously worn and free of make-up found new life with the gifts of Bare Escentuals and Revlon. Previously worn fingernails were adorned with OPI and French tips.
Russian feminism did not mean the destruction of female sexual sensuality. That experiment was tried with the consensus amongst females being simple: unwanted.
Russian feminism was a reclamation of Femininity.
The girls of Russia have created the greatest test to alpha males of the world. They have raised the level of their femininity and in consequences have forced the men of Russia to raise their levels of masculinity which translates to alpha presence. Start.
Girls all over the world love confidence. There in general is a biological program in girls which makes them more prone to a submissive role when with a man. In modern talk it can be translated to confidence.
(Disclaimer: No I do not advocate rape. Maybe is only a yes when you ask her if she wants to be kissed. Otherwise it is a No. Food for thought: Girls love romance novels and every single one I’ve scanned through had quite a vivid “forceful encounter” under the guise of unbridled passion.)
Many guys who have not had the extensive introduction to Eastern European girls, Russian girls in particular, that I was gifted via my parents ask me what they do wrong.
Truth: Hot girls need confidence from their men. They bring the attractive, you bring the balls. Applies to any girl though it is needed in spades with Russian girls. Feminism in
Russia made this so because it is:
A nation of beautiful girls that continually work to upstage one another.
A nation of girls that know that they are desirable on the world sexual market as evidenced by the popularity of Russian mail-ordered brides.
A nation of girls that expect their men to be at the top of their game.
The goofy placating tragedies which encompass the majority of men in America (military included) believe that confidence is overrated and attribute the ruthlessness and the ostentatious displays of wealth of Russian men to be due to a government with a history of bribery and machismo as the rule of law. I argue this is incorrect. The girls forced the men to be this way.
Look at Soviet Russia after World War II. The men were in every sense of the word docile and without drive. There was no outlet for creativity and success was imprisoned. In reality there was no true culture of machismo until after the wall fell.
No. All girls look for confidence.
Fact: The hotter the girl the higher the level of confidence necessary. There are many ways to garner internal confidence be it mentally, monetarily, or physically. Russia is a beautiful nation in that it raises the stakes.
Imagine yourself in the following scenario. Russian men are known not to be trifled with. Veins of ice and eyes immune to pleas of mercy. You are eyeing the girl of an oligarch.
He has the power to kill you and dispose of your body. A less violent retaliation he may take against you is using the bureaucracy to make your life a living hell. Decisions.
She knows you know this as you flirt with her. As if you have no care in the world (I hope your eyes are sharp to any oncoming thugs for hire, be smart). Your alpha dog confidence eclipsing her oligarch boyfriend in this instance.
You could be dirt poor but your alpha-dog mentality made you more attractive than a man who may have been drinking from a jewel encrusted goblet with his own security force outside the club.
If you truly want to know how you stack up as an alpha-dog you can go to an African nation such as South Africa (if you are White), the Congo, or why not Russia.
Go to Moscow. See how well you can compete with your lack of Maybachs or Brioni.
Go to the outskirts of St. Petersburg where dirt roads abound and see if you can not be taken for a fool by the locals.
Russian feminism created the greatest test an alpha-dog can partake in.
The difficulty level is higher than in the United States where refusing to placate the legions enforcing political correctness at the expense of open and meaningful conversation can ruin your reputation.
Disclaimer: Shun any blatant alpha-dog maneuvers in front of mob-dogs. Maintain your confident frame of mind, but be more subtle when picking up his devushka.
It’s not worth your parents not having a body to bury and her losing a comfortable lifestyle.
The following was written by one of the few guys I truly respect at school and in life. I forget how I met him, but I remember him earning my respect while he was spiting game on crutches at a party. Other guys where sulking by walls cradling drinks and waiting for girls to be more socially lubricated. He entered the belly of the beast and slaughtered. Lifetime Respect Earned.
El Vacilador is fellow comrade in the battle against pussification of the modern man. Originally from Mexico, he was raised in Texas, and went to DC to define himself; growing up with crutches helped him develop his own unique style of social interaction, in order to help the readers of the Lifestyle achieve their own version of what it means to be alpha.
There is a term that comes from Mexico that defines that sort of aloof look on life called “La vacilada”. Which is could be seen as a sort of “coping mechanism” for Mexicans due how completely fucked up our history is.
This is a culture where we’d joke about shit that people typically mourn about. (After an Earthquake that destroyed a large portion of Mexico City in 1985, Ronald and Nancy Reagan came to pay their respects to the Mexican President and his wife; when the Reagan’s first came to the President’s residence the first lady opened the door and said “I’m sorry about the mess.”)
The point of La Vacilada is to not worry about shit that you can’t control. Be aware, but not preoccupied of what is happening around you. Since I am on crutches, I’ve grown up being paranoid of getting hurt, not wanting to over exert myself, and basically holding myself back. In the past few years, I’ve made myself commit to a positive change in my life.
I no longer look at my disability as a negative, simply a fact of life. I just returned from living in Mexico City for five months, and during this time I realized a few things about myself that The Lifestyle and it’s readers would dig:
1. Walking everywhere meant that whatever I wanted to do, I had to work for it, no more half ass-ing my shit. If I went to a party or a bar, that’d mean one consistent thing, I’d have to walk up a few flights of stairs to get in. Meaning anywhere I’d travel to it was on me, and only me to get there. I slowly stopped relying on other people, which has helped me in not only talking to girls but people in general; if I’m interested in a girl I’ll take the initiative in talking to her.
2. When you are on crutches, people tend to be more stand offish, just because they either feel uncomfortable around the canes, or they don’t know how stable I am. This is where “La Vacilda” has always helped me in meeting people (I’ve started played a drinking game, where the objective is where each person has a shot, and they need to make up a crazy story as to why I can’t walk, the person with the best story doesn’t take their shot.) the only thing that would hold me back in the past from talking to girls, was that I thought they wouldn’t want to talk to me because I couldn’t walk. Then I realized something, if someone didn’t want to get to know me due to my disability, why would I want to associate with them in the first place.
3. Mexico has never been handicap friendly, which made my folks worry that I’d not get around easily, but I just saw it as a chance for me to see how far I could really push myself. How strong could I become when I was isolated without help; slowly my blistered hands became calluses, I started moving faster, standing taller with a smaller gate, and best of all I could do more without tiring. It jump-started my body; I was no longer living a life of where my fear of failure was overcome by my desire to explore the world around me.
I’ve returned from my homeland stronger than when I left, I no longer waiver when I’m faced with a challenge, I just laugh to myself and get it done.
Once you decide to better yourself and trudge out of the bogs of mediocrity and into paradise you will find yourself faced by the sentinels of scorn.
They will gaze upon your slowly oakening spine and attempt to cut you down. Force you to retreat back into the bog from which you emerged. These sentinels are all around you. The strongest of them hide behind faces of false smiles and twinkling eyes.
Your first test is upon you.
They may be your parents. Your dearest friends. Even your lover. They will notice the slow change in your thinking. They will see the desire in your eye to preserver over the boondock which they call home. They are moved by jealousy. They long ago have succumbed to a belief of hard determinism.
They have accepted that they were not special and that no one is truly special. To see your previously dull eyes gleam with a better future irritates them. Trudge on with sword in hand.
I have seen a few boys grow into alpha-dogs over the year and I have seen the exact same challenge face them from the beginning.
These boys first begin to discover that the world can be molded in their hands. They begin to assert themselves. They begin to dress better. Then the sentinels strike.
They make statements such as liking the old you: the you that was friendlier and more willing to make stupid faces and act goofy in pictures. The you that did everything in your power to make everyone’s time more enjoyable while getting no props.
The you that could be relied on to make anothers life more interesting.
They do not wish to lose their carnival monkey. They enjoyed the ability to get you to do things to please the group. They fear your ability to dictate your path.
They will bombard you with false prophecy. They will attempt to hammer through your slowly strengthening wall of alpha with sledge hammers of guilt.
They will tell you that you used to be such a nice guy. Nice guy translates to easily malleable and not getting laid. (Confident guy can be polite and get laid. Think about it).
They will inevitably drop the Hiroshima: “I can not be around the person you’ve become.”
This is the final onslaught you will face. Do not waiver. If it was a male that said this to you, they were never truly your friend. If it is a female you can smell her arousal slowly wafting.
Remember never to waiver. You must be firm and confident in your chosen path. You should question yourself, but crush the doubt quickly and fearlessly.
Do you not believe people told Teddy Roosevelt that his dreams of slaughtering animals on the plains of Africa were out of his reach due to his childhood disabilities. Without question he exposed to the sweet poisonous words of the sentinels before him. He most likely hesitated. In the end, he squashed the demons of doubt and forced his illness out of him.
Charles Lindbergh faced an onslaught of “helpful friends” who told him that flying an airplane via periscope was foolish and pointless. He lifted into the air as the eagle that he was and conquered records.
When you are faced with detractors, questioners, doubters, and haters you must remember that this is expected.
The path to alphadom is solitary. You will find few and far in between on your path to attainment. Only a few conquer their inner fears and make the choice to leave mediocrity and carve out a world where they are king.
You must earn your smirk. Prepare for battle. Hopefully we will see you among our ranks.
One of my favorite periods in American history is the Great Depression. Sure it was a harsh time. People went hungry and lived in the cold. The general demeanor was miserable. However if you read the tales and look at the photographs, what stares at you are the eyes of perseverance. The souls of those who trudge through hell. You look at a people who lived through such tumultuous times that their eyes twinkled with amusement at the challenge of World War II and finished it off with a smirk.
Looking back at what should be without a doubt considered the Greatest Generation I look with disgust at the unrepentant hedonism of the 60’s and 70’s. The dream like idealistic perception of the MTV’s 80’s and 90’s. Finally, what I consider the beginning of the end: the pussyification of the 2000’s.
I will not go deeper into this. All you need to do is watch Band of Brothers and than take a stroll through your local super-market to see the contrasts.
I will not lie. I was almost a causality of the pussyification of the 2000’s. Due to the public school system (which I will argue is created to suppress individuality and initiative) I believed that manual labor was beneath me. I believed I was some type of special snowflake. You see this attitude throughout 99% of my generation.
Thankfully I learned quickly enough that my resume could not showcase my charisma and that I needed to build it up. For some reason the first job I applied to and worked was planting flowers on a Green Roof in Queens.
Everyday I would take the subway home. Tired. Dirty. Sweated through my clothing. I smelled worse than a homeless shelter. I saw the looks of disgust of those wearing suits. The avoidance of eye contact. The sneers from those working in air conditioning.
That same summer I also worked as a deck hand on a harbor cruise vessel. I spent my time cleaning toilets. Washing windows. Sweeping. I would crawl into bed at 3 a.m. and if I worked a double shift had to leave my house by 7 a.m.Never complained.
I spent last summer working as a high end landscaper. The work was physically intensive, but not as bad as what I had done previously. However I worked in Dupont and Georgetown. Girls would walk by with twisted lips. People would avoid me as I waited for them to pass while leaning on my broom. One father told his son “see what happens when you don’t go to college.”
These are the jobs that helped guide me on the path to Alpha-dom. These were the jobs that made me realize it doesn’t matter what people think of you. These were the jobs that reminded me that only through strife and humility can you achieve greatness.
A life of excess. A life of security. A life without challenge. These are not things I seek. These are the things that made Egypt. Babylon. Rome. Ancienct China. France. England. all weak.
This is my call out to all of you. Seek beyond your comfort zone.
Perhapse I’m wrong. Maybe you can learn about yourself and the world from your air-conditioned cage.
Forget everything I have just said. It doesn’t matter.. Mediocrity is acceptable for the majority.
Look at that picture. Look at his blasé attitude. Look at the desire in hers.
I recently overheard some girls talking about how Taylor Swift is brave to write songs about the pains of love. If they were talking about guys writing songs about the pains of love they would see them as pathetic. Double Standard.
One of the girls cited the song “Dear John” as an example of what a jerk John Mayer was for dumping Taylor Swift. Since she’s “such a great girl.” Trite.
I recently read the lyrics and I have come to the conclusion that John Mayer is an alpha male. The reasoning is simple. I never met a girl who let any guy but an alpha male still stay on her mind.
Let’s examine the lyrics.
My mother accused me of losing my mind,
but I swore I was fine
You paint me a blue sky
and go back and turn it to rain
And I lived in your chess game,
but you changed the rules every day
An interesting thing I’ve learned to passionate relationships is the concept of hot and cold. Girls do this subconsciously, but when a guy throws it towards a female. Sparks happen.
There is an evolutionary prerogative for women to be interested in guys who play by their own rules. Leadership. It’s a seductive quality. The fact that he does not cater to her is a signal to her that he is unconcerned with her walking away. This annoys her. She wants to be his special snowflake.
Well maybe it’s me and my blind optimism to blame
Maybe it’s you and your sick need to give love then take it away
And you’ll add my name to your long list of traitors who don’t understand
And I’ll look back and regret how I ignored when they said “run as fast as you can”
Optimism+Relationship = Dreams of Fairytale
Notice how she knows of his “history” and refers to his ex’s as traitors who didn’t understand him. She puts herself in the same category. She is not blaming him for leaving her. She is not blaming him for anything beyond making her fall in love with him. She takes all the blame for betraying him and leaving. Eye-opening.
If he was a guy with white knight syndrome she would be cracking jokes about him to her friends. If she was married to him she would be pumping him for alimony.
You are an expert at sorry,
and keeping lines blurry
Never impressed by me acing your tests
All the girls that you run dry
with tired, lifeless eyes
cause you burned them out
But I took your matches before fire could catch me,
so don’t look now:
I’m shining like fireworks over your sad, empty town
Here she is giving him credit for being able to appeal to woman’s emotional inner desires. In fact she is giving him credit for being able to leave girls with longing for him even after he ruined their chances for love.
I love the last line. This utters one thing to me: I’m not affected by you because I got over you. Yet she is writing a song about how he messed her up and he’s not to blame because that is just who he is and she recognizes that. Apologist.
Indifference is not an emotion a girl feels towards a guy she saw as an alpha.
I have met many who believe the key to bedding a beautiful girl is money, clothing, and looks. They help get you 30% of the way there.
The other 70% is making a girl feel comfortable around you. A girl becomes comfortable when she is willing to be alone with you and let her friends go on their way. A girl feels comfortable around you when she lets you kiss her. A girl feels comfortable when you both are playing “Ten Toes Up, Ten Toes Down.”
Now there are a number of ways to make a girl feel comfortable around you in person. Mainly not being creepy, desperate, and socially inept. These are skills that you have to develop through ponder, practice patience, and perseverance.
However too many guys neglect creating comfort in their own home. They find themselves confused and seething when a girl makes for the exit. They call her a cock-tease.
Dearest proteges. You forgot that your home is your kingdom and your kingdom a direct reflection of you as a ruler.
1. Your apartment should be spotless. Your bathroom must be sparkling. The beautiful thing about our generation is that it has become somewhat expected that a guy’s place is to be in disarray. Tetanus shot necessary on exit. She expects to find hair from your shave in the sink. Hair on the toilet seat. Pizza boxes on the floor.
Imagine her surprise when your home looks immaculate. It’s easier to make moves on a couch when there aren’t pairs of jeans on them.
2. Decorations. Share who you are with the essence of alpha. There is nothing wrong with having movie posters of your favorite movies, but frame them. Replace duct-tape with nails. If you are a Star-Trek fan, do not be ashamed, however make that fact awesome. Buy props instead of replicas and display them with style. One of the greatest blunders men make when decorating their home is buying things that “look cool” but do not have a story behind them. Everything in my apartment has a story to it because I would not showcase it unless I found it important.
Does that painting on my wall have a story? Yes. Does that punching bag in the corner? Yes. Does that bomb next to the couch? Yes. Are those Crayons and a Coloring Book on the coffee table? Yes. Story? Definitely.
3. Your Bedroom
The Bed. This is perhapse the easiest place to mess up. You may not realize it but spending money on high-thread counts is godly. Combine it with a down-comforter and down pillows of great caliber and your bed becomes addictive.
After a night with a girl, even your own girlfriend, initiate the rendezvous method. Always wash your sheets after a rendezvous. Women have a superior sense of scent compared to men. She will be able to smell if another woman was on your bed. Play it safe.
Your room. Girls whom you have slept with more than three times have a habit of leaving inconsequential things behind. Territory-Marking. Things such as scrunchies, ear-rings, lip gloss. I do not know if this is conscious or sub-conscious, but it requires you to become vigilant. While the sheets are in the wash, I scour. When I was younger a girl found a hair band that did not belong to her. I kept my cool, however it took her two days until she started texting me again. Easily Avoidable.
Make sure your room smells good. Use lamps to create a mood via lighting. Shadows on the wall are best.
Leaving Your Girl In Your Place Alone For A Minute.
This is very important. Always make sure your “questionable” items are hidden away at all times. When your girl goes into your bathroom, you can bet she is going through your medicine closet and anything else that can store things. Fact Finding.
When you go to the bathroom and she feels as if she has a ton of time (such as her showing up early and you still haven’t showered) she will go through your closet and drawers.
Actually you can use this to your advantage. You can plant things in order to have her ask questions which she won’t verbalize. Leaving a bullet casing somewhere near your drawers, silk handkerchiefs, maybe a roll of foreign currency. Mystery=Aphrodisiac.
Finally. Always have a bottle of wine on hand.
Something fascinating about girls is that they love to be a part of a conspiracy. Us versus Them. It is a phenomena which any one can take advantage of. It helps create a stronger connection between a guy and girl (or girl and girl for my bisexual/lesbian readers).
I am not sure why girls enjoy being a part of conspiracies, I’m sure there is evolutionary biological reason for this (cuckolding – beta provider, alpha genes) but it is something I try to incorporate when I spend time with a girl.
People Watching is the best way to do this. When ever I hang out with a girl a walk ensues. Once this happens I know that conversation will eventually stagnate and thus attempt to find a park bench in a high traffic area as quickly as possible. I take the lead and sit down. She will follow.
Now if you are out for the first time with her or even second, she may not sit close enough to you. She may keep the safe socially appropriate distance. The easiest way to conquer this is to lean over and whisper. She most likely will have a hard time hearing you and this allows you a non-threatening (sexless) reason to slide over to get closer to her. It is important that you have a good reason to whisper. Conspiratorial.
People whisper to avoid offending another party. This is good for you since you will be talking about people whom neither of you know. Public Access Television. As much as girls hate to admit it, they enjoy “shitting” on others. Use this to your advantage. Make funny comments that would embarrass the person if they heard it.
“Jesus, are those tights or leather pants? Horrid.”
“That guy looks just like his dog.”
“Jesus, that girl looks like Boy George”
The point is to not be mean spirited, but appear observational.
This is best done when conspiring about couples. I have noticed that the more awkwardness I point out between younger couples, the more the girl relaxes and adjusts her body in order to make us appear as if we’ve been together for a long time and have passed the awkward phase. Speed Dating. The nicer things you point out in older couples, the more receptive and willing to please she becomes. Mirroring.
Creating a conspiracy is not only a good technique at the dawn of a relationship, but can also be used to strengthen it.
This is best done when another suitor appears and attempts to maneuver into your girl’s circle. If you’ve been alpha all along, your girl will pick you over any guy (unless he out-alpha’s you. All part of the game). However she may enjoy the attention. Ego-Boost. The important thing is to not get jealous. Relationship Killer. Rather you need to work with her in order to create a conspiracy to “con” the other guy. Bonnie and Clyde.
Last spring I was hanging out with a girl in Queens. We had been seeing each other when ever I was in town. One night we were at a lounge and she was one of the most attractive girls in the venue. Vultures begin circling.
An hour in my girl was dancing on the dance floor alone, shooing guys who attempted to grab onto her. I have no fear. She came with me and I have no investment in her beyond a few fun hours. As I was watching her sway to the music I took a moment to scan the crowd. Threat assessment. I noticed the signs of a guy preparing himself to talk to her. Rattlesnake. I knew he would not be a challenge. His buddies were giving him the prep talk. He was holding a drink. Liquid Courage.
He of course missed the biggest signs of a girl being at a venue with another guy. She was not surrounded by females that appeared to be her friends. Girls at night travel in packs. She was not sitting by herself at the bar and thus wasn’t new to the neighborhood and hadn’t made any friends to go out with yet (unless a girl is really outgoing she will not feel comfortable to be dancing alone).
He simply saw her dancing alone and concluded she was alone. My smirk grew.
My girl walks up to the bar, I told her to get me a seltzer after she was done, and Player Boy sidles up to her from behind. Rookie mistake. Always approach a girl from a position where she can obviously see you, give her a chance to appraise you. Coming at anyone from behind is dangerous. Flight or Flee.
He begins to chat her up. The girl, bless her soul, is the type that feels bad shooting any guy that has the courage to talk to her and will continue the conversation. I see her tense up. Time to intervene. Don Quixote.
Now I could have came over and made a big deal that she was with me. This would have been pathetic. Instead I decided to alpha dog it. I come over to her, in eye range, and discretely pump my hand down a few times to let her know to slow down and let her know I am in control of the situation. I come up to her other side and ask the bartender for a seltzer.
I slowly turn around and make a comment about her earrings or necklace. I begin to chat her up. Lover Boy at first does not say anything. I am watching his face to see if he will leave or will engage me. His brow furrows. His facial muscles tense. Here it comes.
“You know man, its real rude to interrupt when two people are having a conversation.”
“My bad, I saw her earrings and thought that my mom would love them. Here let me buy you a drink.”
“Oh, it’s no problem man, appreciate the drink.”
I turn to the bartender and appear to order a drink for him, but theatrically I stop myself and turn to face him.
“Hey I have an idea, are you a betting man?”
“What do you mean?”
“How about this. I bet I can get this girl to say fifty words without the letter a in thirty seconds. If she can’t I’ll buy you guys two rounds. If she can, you cover my next seltzer. Fair?”
I can see his mind work as he attempts to figure out my angle. Naturally his mind isn’t creative enough to know how I am going to do this. He looks at her, she looks nervous and surprised. His fears of her being in on it are abated. There is no way she can say fifty words without the letter a in thirty seconds. He decides to take my bet.
My girl turns to me. Incredulity pasted on her face. My face impassive.
“So we’re cool. You win, you guys get two rounds. I win, seltzer?”
“Yeah man, its you’re money.”
I lean over to my girl and whisper “Count from one to fifty. Go.”
Smile etches onto her face. She starts. At thirty he realizes he’s been had. I leave them with seltzer in hand. A little later she comes over and has a mischievous glint in her eye for the rest of the night.
With a girl never play the same tune twice.
One of the gifts my parents gave me was growing up in a city full of beauty. I did not realize the high level of attractiveness in NYC compared to the rest of the nation until I left. Disheartening. However such exposure has helped me become immune to the physical beauty that a woman may posses. Teflon.
Men are genetically programmed to find themselves attempting feats to astound. There was a time when we lived in tribes and resources were scarce. Girls had to find the best they could and that meant one thing: who could provide the most resources to her. Smart thinking.
Imagine yourself in the position of a prehistoric girl. Imagine that you are the most attractive. The most physically fertile. The most likely to survive childbirth in order to breast-feed the superior baby of the tribe.
(Fact: many men find blondes attractive more so than any other hair color because blonde hair denotes youth: The younger, the lighter. Tools of the trade.)
However there is one in the tribe that is not paying attention to you. He may not have the most resources or even be the most physically dominating specimen. However you are intrigued. You find yourself wanting to be in his presence. What is it about him that attracts you. Simple, he has a brain.
As an alpha male it is your duty to do the opposite of what everyone else in the world is doing. Counter-intuitive.
People respect firemen because they run into the flames while everyone else is running away. You must do the same.
Humans are creatures of habit. When in doubt we revert to our preprogrammed channels of action. When you decided to take the plunge into alphadom you made the conscious decision to reprogram yourself.
Early on you will find yourself reverting to your previous programmed actions when you are in doubt. This you must conquer. Nothing will test you more than in the presence of a beautiful girl.
If you are ever so inclined, as I was, videotape the men around an attractive girl during a social gathering. You can see them doing everything in their power to win her over. Their body language speaks volumes. They are leaning into her and have foolish grins on their faces.
Look at her eyes. Depression. Disgust. She doesn’t want a Jello-spined sycophant. She wants a challenge. Enter you.
Your mission from now on is to never be easily impressed. Her skin is radiant. Lips full. Breast phenomenal. Legs toned. Glint of sexuality in the eyes.
Let other’s slobber. You give her an amused smirk. All seen before.
Remember to keep your posture dominant and relaxed. Remember that she is not the most important thing in the room. Do not smell of desperation. Eventually this will become natural. Until then you require meta-scrutiny. You must remind yourself everyday that you are the top dog. Top dogs do not beg for bones. The receive affection.
Use the same meta-scrutiny with celebrities and with your heroes. No one respects a person with brown on their nose. They respect a firm handshake, the international signal of equality.
Never Pause In Front of Beauty.
There are two ways to shine in a structured social situation. The first one is to be famous, rich, or the one with the last bottle of booze. The second is to run the room.
In a previous post I discussed the power of the eye gaze [here]. Now it is time to put it to good use. As the New Year approaches you should be making resolutions to take a more active role in your social life. You should be motivating yourself to crawl far from your comfort zone. Attend any and every party. Join organizations and go to their parties. Learn to become the king of the social domain.
It is hard to do this. To this day I must remind myself of time of the few basic tenants of running a room. However the more you practice the more seamless it becomes. While others will rely on liquid courage you will rely on your veins of ice.
The room should be dark until you walk in. You are the blue glowing light that attracts all to you. They will be electrified by your presence.
Do not leave your home unless you will be the best dressed person out. This is not hard. Purchase Esquires Handbook of Style. Live it.
First you must learn how to enter. View the clip below.
This is not for amateurs. You must ascertain the secret spread the aura of an entrance presence. I will not tell you how to do this. Each of us has our own delivery system. You must tailor make it to yourself.
However there are things that I remind you of.
I – When you first walk in pause for a moment. Slowly move your head and take in the world before you. Take notice where the wall flowers are as well as the high energy individuals. Make eye contact with those that make it with you. Hold it until they turn away. Remind yourself, this was nothing until you arrived.
II – If you have friends already at the venue approach them slowly and deliberately. Flow through the crowd. If there is no one approach the bar (if there is one) and begin building a relationship with the bar-tender. Introduce yourself when buying your drink. Pay cash and tip well. Always cultivate this rapport.
Your entrance complete, perhapse a drink in hand as you slowly build a relationship with the hard-liquor meister it is time to begin your domination.
Warning. Always hold your drink below eye gaze. Never in front of you. This creates a subconscious barrier and will it harder to talk to people.
Many boys make the mistake of approaching the attractive girls first. This is a mistake. Remember you are not concerned about getting laid. You refuse to smell of desperation. You are there to make the world a better place for everyone present. This means that you must do two things.
A – Approach the wallflowers. The preponderance will be socially awkward and fearful of social interactions. Shyness. You must help the wallflowers bloom. You are the rich soil, the caressing sunrays, and life-giving rain storm. From my own experience the wall-flowers are some of the most interesting people at a party as well as the ones that have the possibility of helping you reach a level beyond what you have already attained.
They will remember you.
B – Swoop the Ignored. In any group of conversation there will always be that person that appears if they have been pushed out of the conversation. Approach these conversational cast-offs. Unlike wallflowers, whom you may approach willy-nilly you need a “reason” to talk to them. I personally utilize an observational tone or make a statement how “I wish I had the courage to dance as freely as that kid.”
Eventually they will introduce you to the rest of the group and you can quietly spread your magical seduction.
When in a conversation with a person remember the Golden Rule: People love talking about themselves. The longer you allow them to talk about themselves the more they like you.
Silver Rule: People are intrigued by the mysterious. You must be the mysterious aspect at all times.
When I enter a conversation with someone I do everything in my power to steer the conversation towards them. Talleyrand. When they become self-conscious and notice that they have been talking about yourself and ask a question about you. Answer vaguely and steer the conversation towards them again.
Example: (This person is studying psychology)
They: So what’s your major?
You: I’m studying international relations, but my real passion lies in micro-expressions. Have you covered Paul Eckman in your classes and his study on emotions and facial muscles?
What you have done here is given an answer, but once again pushed the conversation into a domain they are comfortable with.
Many people are afraid that they will not have anything to say to someone. The beauty of this method is that the conversation is fueled by them while you learn about the person and figure out if they are someone you wish to add to your life.
Now earlier I mentioned that you should refrain from attacking the attractive girls at first entrance. This is because you need to build a foundation. Girls are all about social standing. You must create the highest possible.
Now if you are hard-pressed for time, such as bar-hopping, I will offer you the cheat sheet.
Nod your head up at every guy you pass.
They will return your nod. I do not know why, but they will. Even I will acknowledge someone who acknowledges me with a nod. Handshakes no, nod yes.
If you do this to enough people, girls will notice and think that you are some big shot. Interests will be peaked.
Go out. Practice. Dominate. Acolytes will follow.